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While it is painful to even think about, you’ve started to have this nagging suspicion in the back of your mind that your husband may be cheating on you with an escort in Widnes . Whether he heads out late at night to run ambiguous errands, comes back home and immediately heads to the shower, or returns home appearing to have already showered at a different location — these are the signs that led you to believe your husband may be engaging in extramarital infidelity with a Widnes escort.

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What is important to know with this type of activity, in general, is that seeing an escort agency in Widnes is not usually one of the first steps of extramarital infidelity. If your husband has been, in fact, seeing an escort — there is a good chance that he has a history of unfaithfulness to one degree or another. As an example, before man would visit a local Widnes escort, it is likely that he has a history, generally a long history, with pornography in general. In addition to viewing pornography, there is also the chance that these men have used various websites, such as married but looking websites, adult chat rooms, escort websites, and so forth, before they have actually met up with an escort agency in Widnes .

However, because men who visit Widnes escort agencies oftentimes have a long history of deviance from their marital vows, online infidelity investigation services can help to uncover both the types of websites that your husband has visited as well as potentially catching them trying to solicit an escort.

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When you hear that an experienced sex surrogate partner is inviting you to learn about intimacy, compassion and sensual caring, what does that really mean? What is a sex surrogate?

By definition a sexual surrogate, or surrogate partner, is a professional who helps clients overcome sexual dysfunction. Most surrogates are women, a few are men and there are also married couples that practice surrogacy together. The general term of sexual surrogacy can involve varying levels of practice. Some surrogates work at counseling centers while others have their own office. Some surrogates offer additional services besides surrogacy such as telephone counseling or sexological bodywork.

The majority of surrogates you meet will have a strong educational background and legitimate credentials, dealing with sexuality, psychology and counseling. Surrogates should always be certified in their practices; this allows them to work closely with psychiatrists, psychologists, sexologists and therapists in the best interests of the client.

[Note: Throughout this text, the client is referred to as male. Though single men do make up the majority of surrogate clients, there are also female clients and married couples who seek out surrogacy solutions together.]

Indeed, there is a science to help sexual dysfunction. The cure is beyond just listening to a client's problems, beyond explaining the solutions, and certainly beyond sexual intimacy. A skilled sex surrogate knows that a combination of all three factors--that is talking, listening and demonstration--are necessary to truly help resolve a client's sexual problems beyond just a quick counseling session.

What kind of specific problems are we talking about? While a surrogate deals with many different types of cases in a year's time, there are many typical problems that come up. Some are psychological; men may have trouble with intimacy, a lack of confidence, communication problems with women in general, dating anxiety and sexual inhibitions. Others are physical dysfunctions that require more particular treatment, such as impotence, premature ejaculation, or an assortment of diseases that could cause painful intercourse. Sometimes there are people who have experienced a change in lifestyle due to a disability, and a surrogate can help them explore and develop sexual potential. The term of sexual dysfunction is very broad and what methods a surrogate might use to help improve sexual function are just as varied. Simply put, treatments must be decided upon on an individual basis by a therapist. What can cure one person of a particular sexual phobia might not help someone else. Surrogates know this and therefore must have very adept social and interpersonal skills.

This is why surrogates work closely with sex therapists. Since many sexual problems are psychological rather than physical, communication pays a key role in the process. Not only between lovers, not only between a client and his sex surrogate, but also between the surrogate and the therapist.

What does it mean when expressions like "personal contact", "sensual caring" and "adult advice" are used? Do sexual surrogates become sexually acquainted with their clients? How is it that sexual surrogacy differs from sexual advice or even "sex coaching?"

First of all, sexual surrogacy is not just about sex as a device. If you try and meet a certified surrogate and fictionalize a sexual problem just for your own entertainment, you're not going to get very far. Sexual surrogacy is about sexual, physical and psychological health. Remember that surrogates work closely with therapists or psychologists, ensuring that the problem is corrected and that the client makes significant progress. Instead of providing a man with a date, as would an escort agency, a surrogate would help men improve their social and dating skills, if the therapist agreed there was a problem. But surrogacy is not a sex business--it's a field of study, a professional practice, a source of sexual education.

On the other hand, sexual surrogacy would be more intense than just regular sexual coaching. Usually coaching, or other forms of adult advice, offers only head knowledge with no real resolution of the client's problem. Frankly, coaching seems appropriate for clients that just like to talk and are not quite ready to take appropriate steps to fix the problem. A sex surrogate, in accordance with a qualified therapist, would offer therapeutic exercises to help the client. This might include showing relaxation techniques, intimate communication, teaching social skills, and some sexual touching if the surrogate and therapist feel it's necessary.

In short, a sex surrogate is someone who helps people with their sexual problems. They don't just lend a sympathetic ear. They take action to help their clients through various sexual problems and restore a person's natural sex life to where it should be. They do this with help from a therapist, and of course, with help from the client who truly wants to make a change in his life and puts forth the effort to make those changes.

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There will always be plenty to do at any swinger house party you are invited to. It could be as casual as just chatting and mingling among different couples while you have a few drinks by the pool or hot tub. If things get really hot there will be plenty of opportunities for you to get involved sexually in one of the empty bedrooms set aside for sexual play, or maybe even join in on an orgy, which is bound to happen at every party. Your host will explain anything that is unique to their party, and will usually be very willing to introduce you around to the other guests.

At some point in a conversation with another couple, or even a single man or woman, you might be asked "Would you like to go off to one of the rooms?" or "Would you like to play?" You are absolutely allowed to say no. In fact, respecting someone's no is a cardinal rule. A polite "no thank you" is perfectly acceptable, and you are never required to give an explanation. Because bi-curious and bi-sexual women are very common in the Swinging Lifestyle, you might wind up talking to a couple where they both ask your wife or girlfriend to go off to one of the rooms to play. You should both decide how you want to deal with that ahead of time. If you do accept their invitation, she should make it clear whether she expects to play with both of them or just him.

A common occurrence that takes place at private house parties that your wife should be cautious of is the possibility of someone uninvited touching her when she is with someone else. If she does not say anything and just tries to ignore it, the other party will assume that it is an invitation. Instead of ignoring it she can move their hand, shake her head no, or just tell them she wants to be alone. Of course, if she feels uncomfortable doing any of these things, you can always do it for her. They will go away and then she can go back to concentrating on what she was doing. If you want to go to one of the rooms for a private party, avoid the rooms with several beds together. Although the right of refusal always applies, because these are usually known as the group or orgy rooms, you can expect that others will want to join in on the action.

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If you've been fantasizing about swinging and just don't know how to get started, we're here to come to the rescue. After reading our tips for beginners you'll see that adopting the swinging lifestyle is much easier than you might have thought.

1. Consider Your Reasons

When couples first start talking about swinging together, it's important that they discuss their reasons for adopting this new lifestyle. There can be healthy reasons such as wanting to spice up their intimate life, and there can be unhealthy reasons such as one partner simply wanting to appease another. If you're looking at swinging as a way to fix a broken relationship, you might be disappointed. The swingers lifestyle is generally for strong, healthy couples looking for a little adventure. If this doesn't sound like you, you might want to reconsider.

2. Talk about Expectations

There are many options in the world of swinging; swinger parties and swingers clubs, swinging with other couples or people of the same sex. Chances are you and your partner have a few fantasies you'd like to play out together.

3. Set Some Ground Rules

An important step for beginners is to set some ground rules up front. For example, if you are both at a swinging party or club and one of you wants to leave early, is it okay for the other person to stay behind? Should you always be in the same room together? Are you comfortable watching your partner be with someone of the same sex? No doubt you probably have some preferences and expectations - make sure you talk about this up front.

4. Create a Persona

Most swingers like to keep this part of their lives private and so they create personas to be used online and at parties and clubs. Lots of swinging couples make up fake names and this is perfectly acceptable in the swinging world.

5. Meet Online

One of the best places to find other swingers to hook up with is online. The Internet is filled with adult dating sites where you can meet couples and individuals willing to meet or come to your home. You and your partner simply create a catchy profile with photos and then start searching through member profiles. Strike up a dialogue with people you are interested in and make a plan to meet up.

6. Consider your Options

Once you find couples or individuals you're attracted to, set up a time to talk on the phone and then meet in person. It's probably a good idea to meet for just drinks the first time so you have the chance to check each other out and set up a second meeting. If you don't feel a connection, just be honest and move on.

7. Check out Swinging Clubs

There are probably quite a few more swingers clubs in your area than you were aware of. A quick online search will let you know where they are and how to participate. You can also ask other swingers you meet online on adult dating sites. Before you go, find out if the club is open to everyone or couples only. Also, find out if they have special theme nights.

8. Try Out a Swingers Party

If you are invited to a swingers party, here are a couple of things to keep in mind:

  • Arrive on time
  • Smell and look good
  • Don't be pushy or unfriendly
  • Practice safe sex
9. Respect People's Privacy

When you meet another swinging couple or individual, respect their right to privacy by not asking too many questions. Unless you've been given advanced permission, don't take any photos or video. Don't take it personally if they don't want to see you again. Many swingers want to stay as anonymous as possible.

10. Have Fun

The swingers lifestyle should be fun and exciting. If you're finding that it is causing tension or drama in your relationship, just stop. This alternative lifestyle is not for everyone and should only be pursued by couples who are truly enjoying themselves.

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All of us who have struggled with sexual addictions have had to face the reality of lost innocence. Whether we're recovering from addiction to pornography or other forms of sexual compulsion, a big part of recovery is facing the need to 'unlearn' our behavior. Maybe you need to quit so you can be truly intimate with your spouse, or just so you can confidently look yourself and others in the eye. Whatever the reason, until we can get all those terrible tempting thoughts under control, we will not be free of our sexual addictions. By understanding the sex drugs, getting sexual addiction help, and 'reprogramming' our sex drive, we can make great progress toward recovered innocence.

Sexual Addictions Are Drug Addictions: Porn and sex addictions are probably the most difficult addictions known to mankind, or womankind, for that matter. This is because sexual addiction is drug addiction, but the drugs are free and available any time and anywhere. All you have to do is think sexual thoughts and the sex drugs begin to flow, driving you toward a climactic release of chemicals into the blood stream. Our bodies manufacture these drugs so we'll want to reproduce. Under natural circumstances, there is nothing wrong with this drive or these chemicals. We make this process unnatural when we reprogram our sex drives toward images, sexual body parts, promiscuity or even more destructive behaviors, like bestiality or pedophilia.

Because of the chemicals involved, one of the symptoms of the addiction is developing affections for the objects of our sexual misbehavior. We chemically trick ourselves into believing we're expressing love. The addiction overpowers the normal sex drive, making natural lovemaking increasingly difficult, compelling us toward ever more deviant and destructive sexual behavior. When we understand pornography and sexual addictions are drug addictions, we're given a valuable tool for regaining control.

Stop Using The Sex Drugs: Abstinence is as powerful a tool against porn and sex addictions as it is against alcoholism and drug addictions...there really is no difference, except availability. So, though it should be no surprise, it may shock you to learn that sexual abstinence for at least a year (sometimes 2-3 years) is necessary to defeat this addiction and regain some measure of sexual innocence. This means no normal sex, no porn, no masturbation...nothing. If you're like me, it may also mean giving up movies and TV with sex scenes, commercials with partially clothed people in them, magazines and even clothing catalogs if there are underwear or bathing suit pictures. Yes, it is possible! It's just not easy! Now, after years of controlling my impulses, I can have that stuff around and even watch TV and movies with little temptation...just have to look away during some scenes and commercials. How important is it to you to overcome this addiction?

Get Help With Sexual Addiction: If recovery is important to you, getting help should be just as important. Yes, I know it's embarrassing. I've been embarrassed that way. Others will tell you what they learned in a book. I'm telling you what I learned by reading and practice, that helped me. One of the things that helped was being accountable to my wife and to others who didn't suffer from the same addiction. The power of sexual addiction is secrecy. If you reveal the secret, you leave no place for the addiction to hide. No, you don't have to advertise in the newspaper! Your spouse and one other trusted friend or counselor are usually enough as long as you're committed to being complete and honest. Failures (they will happen) need to be revealed to those you're accountable to. They should question you and forgive you as long as the frequency is decreasing. If we're dishonest or evasive about it or if the frequency is increasing, these friends should confront us strongly, to help us in the fight.

Abstinence and helpful accountability are ways to keep from doing the sexual misbehavior we've already decided we won't do. Now, what do we do with all that time and all those thoughts we've encouraged over the years? This is where 'reprogramming' comes in.

Reprogram Your Sex Drive: We thought we were just playing or engaging in fantasy, but reprogramming our sex drives took regular imagination, effort and commitment. To reprogram it to respond to the wrong behavior is easy, because the response produces an immediate reward in the form of sex drugs. Now, to reprogram our sex drives back to natural behavior requires a strong commitment and effort, with no tangible reward...just the satisfaction and self-esteem of having regained control of our bodies. How do we do this? In our minds!

All sex happens in the brain! A couple thousand years ago, a guy by the name of Jeheshua said all we have to do is think about sex and we've engaged in sex. I know that makes most of us adulterers and worse, but it points to the power we need to overcome our addiction. The moment we have a sexual thought, the chemicals begin pumping...that's how pornography works, and why we need to control the images and ideas we get from the computer, books, movies, etc. Still, there are a lot of sexual thoughts already permanently in our brains. If we've taken the time to develop an addiction, these thoughts will pop up often. So, how do we fight those thoughts?

When discussing my sexual addiction, a good friend told me, You can't keep a bird from landing on your head, but you can keep it from building a nest there." Reprogramming the sex drive involves chasing those birds away every time they land. We can build an arsenal of powerful good thoughts to replace the ones we're chasing away. We can pursue positive hobbies and activities that occupy our thoughts. We can listen to music, read uplifting books and volunteer our services to the community. We can collect memories and emotions we felt while looking at a tree, the sky, a waterfall, etc. These can be powerful tools to chase away sexually addictive thoughts. If you dwell on a thought, it gathers strength. If you push it out of your mind, it becomes weak. The more we force our minds to ignore sexual images and to focus on uplifting and positive thoughts, the more freedom we'll have from addiction. Those tempting images will happen less often and be far less powerful.

Well, I didn't promise it would be easy, but it is possible to overcome sexual addictions and regain much of the innocence we once had. We need a strong commitment to abstain from sexual activity, be accountable to a trusted friend and to mentally push out those tempting thoughts and images. From personal experience, I can tell you, the rewards in self-confidence and a satisfying natural sex life make the battle worthwhile.


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